Zee's Scare Tonight

When I had an AK-47 pointed at my chest on my way to Burma I was truly scared. When February gripped his shovel showing intentions of beating me with it I was truly scared. When a group of men with machetes tried to stop my car in the Dominican I was truly scared. Tonight, I was truly scared.

My neighbor send me a text message when I was at work reminding me that she was having a celebration for her birthday at the gay club tonight starting at 9:00 and she wanted me to be there. I got there closer to 10:00 and walked around expecting to see the neighbors that I usually see there. Instead I saw primarily women, a few of which were dressed like men. That's not uncommon but these women were taking it a few steps further and had drawn on facial hair and what not. I didn't see anyone I knew and got a number of dirty looks from women as I glanced from table to table looking for a familiar face. I then noticed the sign... Friday is Drag King night. I sent texts to a couple of the people I expected to see and told them where I was and asked where they would be. They responded with they would be there shortly.

Normally in that situation I would find a table with people at it that didn't seem engaged with each other. I'd approach the table tell them I'm waiting for friends, tell a few jokes, and maybe a story or two and make new friends. I have not and I will not approach people like that at the gay bar. A lot of women there don't just prefer the company of women they truly dislike men. Men there may or may not get the wrong idea if I did that and I wouldn't chance it to find out.

I tried to just play it cool and stand on the wall and people watch, which is one of my favorite things to do. I continued to get dirty looks from women and decided to just look at the floor and wait. A woman 'bumped' into me and when I looked up she said, "What the fuck?!?!?!" I was scared. There is no way I wanted to get my ass beat by a bunch of women. I will not hit a woman even if she is beating the shit out of me.

"I am sorry, my bad." Was my reply. She didn't look satisfied... she just stood there staring me down. I looked around. I'm not sure if I was looking for help or looking for the nearest exit. If I had made it to an exit I'm sure I could out run her. Screaming like a woman and running like a man is often a very effective way to avoid an ass whoppin'. As I looked around I saw Tony my neighbor so I shouted to him in my gayest voice possible, "Tony! There you are!" Man hating lesbians don't seem to be as threatened by gay men. She bought it and walked away.

Drag King night turned out to be scary in general. These women would come out looking like men and dance and the other women would shout and cheer and give them dollars. They all were charged up and very aggressive. Given the choice I'd rather be on that bridge again then face to face with a woman who is ready to kick my ass in a gay bar.